Grandma’s rules? Okay, you can leave then.
First time I’ve ever heard of grandma rules but it’s a clinker, great real life story of malicious compliance posted by /user/BissoumaTequila/ on reddit
This happened about 6 years ago when I worked at my local pub.
Now for context the landlord operated on a “Grandma’s Rules” in the pub. Meaning anything you said or done that would offend my Grandma or yours then you’re out. You don’t offend Grandma. Simple.
I used to supervise the bar while my landlord dealt with the office stuff to help balance the workload. It was a great job overall – decent wage, was right on my doorstep and the regulars were class. Except one. We shall call her Karen.
Karen was getting married to one of the regulars and was a complete bitch. She was this horrible morbidly obese woman who would complain about the size of the stools and how it doesn’t fit her. What’s worse is she doesn’t acknowledge you. She would just huff and puff until she gets a new drink – I HATED that and so did every member of staff.
One day I got fed up and ignored her because she snapped at me for saying hello. The situation went as follows:
Karen: “well aren’t you going to serve me?!”
K: “Err, Grandma’s rules?! My grandma would be offended if I sat here with an empty glass for too long!”
I immediately had a lightbulb moment and waited my moment to strike. I served her as normal and spoke to my landlord about her in the office. I explained what I wanted to do and he gave me the go ahead.
I went back to the bar where she was spitting fire at the new bar girl I was training. I just calmly told the bar girl to ignore her, serve the customers. I then took her drinks, poured them down the sink and asked her to leave.
Karen: “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!”
Me: “Sorry, Grandma’s Rules. She thinks you’re a bitch and wants you to leave.”
Spoiler: the landlord is actually a landlady and my Grandma.